Zero meat, 100% taste: Burger King is defending vegan patties. Photo / Getty Images
When is a sausage not a sausage? The 720 members of the European Parliament tried to answer that delicate question last month.
Conservative politicians with connections to farmers’ lobby groups voted through a new rule that says certain food product names – things like sausage, burger or steak – must
be reserved for edibles made out of actual animals. Vege burgers, tofu sausages, seitan schnitzels, vegan tuna and any other of their woke, plant-based brethren must be renamed, the parliament said.
Vegetal descriptors are a surprisingly contentious issue. Those who want the vegetarian meat foods retitled argue such names are confusing to consumers, a horrendous injustice to farmers and even somehow – don’t ask how – make it harder for farmers to earn a living.
“A steak, an escalope or a sausage are products from our livestock, not laboratory art nor plant products,” said French parliamentarian Céline Imart, who tabled the amendment. “There is a need for transparency and clarity for the consumer and recognition for the work of our farmers.”
Apparently, farmer-friendly politicians have tried this before. But back in 2020, their linguistic revolution against the evil vegetarians failed.
However, since the 2024 elections, more conservatives have entered the European Parliament, so Imart and her flesh-eating cronies were able to have their way with the vege burger this time.
On the other side of the debate are organisations such as Greenpeace, the biggest supermarket chains in Europe and, believe it or not, Burger King.
Greenpeace points out eating more plants and less meat is better for the environment, the protection of which the EU allegedly champions.
Some even suspect a sinister campaign by the meat lobby to prevent people from buying vege burgers because obviously, if this ban goes through, shoppers won’t recognise them any more.
Meanwhile, proponents say selling plant-based foods will become a lot harder, especially, one imagines, if they have to come up with new names. Think about it. Will tofu sausages become tofu fingers, or tofu bars, or long vegetarian snacks, or something else equally perplexing?
In an open letter, concerned businesses also point out the economic damage this could do, especially in Germany. The central European nation is the biggest market for plant-based meat alternatives in Europe. Last year, sales totalled €1.68 billion (NZ$3.38 billion), having jumped by 13.5% between 2022 and 2024.
“The long-term economic potential of this sector is estimated at up to €65 billion and provides up to 250,000 jobs, with a large export share within the EU,” the letter signatories argued. “German companies would therefore be disproportionately affected by an EU-wide ban.”
Contentious the debate may be, but it’s not all bad. It’s also been an opportunity for European MPs to show off their inner comedian and journalists to come up with some meaty puns.
Politico reported that straight after the vote the Parliament’s canteen served up “vegan burgers”. It sold out. “Civil disobedience,” Dutch Green Party member Anna Strolenberg suggested.
“Vege burgers, seitan schnitzel and tofu sausage do not confuse consumers, only right-wing politicians,” a member of Austria’s Green Party quipped.
And, as another Austrian politician, Anna Stürgkh, pointed out, “a beef tomato doesn’t contain any beef … ladies’ fingers are not made of actual ladies’ fingers. Let’s trust consumers and stop this hotdog populism.”
The rule still has to pass through further legislative stages before it’s finalised.
But whatever happens, and no matter how many taxpayer dollars are wasted on this debate, it’s okay. Because we’ll always have this great new phrase: “hotdog populism”.
Cathrin Schaer is a freelance journalist living in Berlin.
